Let's Talk About........With Nicky Perfect
Nicky Perfect BEM is a former Hostage and Crisis Negotiator who worked with people and families in extreme crisis and later became Course Director for the UK’s National Negotiation Course. She has trained negotiators and leaders around the world and studied psychology, relationships, human behaviour, personal development and coaching. In this podcast, she applies hostage and crisis negotiation principles to everyday communication. Episodes offer real stories, practical strategies and insights for listening well, navigating conflict calmly and building stronger relationships at home, at work and in leadership.
Episodes
A Single Conversation Sparked A Trip That Changed How I Communicate
A 14-hour bus ride, four hours along some very challenging roads and a village welcome filled with singing and dancing.It sounds like a travel story, but my trip to Tanzania became something much more.I came home thinking about communication, community, education and how much we can understand about another human being — even when we don't speak the same language.In this episode of Let's
Why Conflict Happens And How To Talk Through It
One small moment can light a fuse: a late sleep-in, a sharp comment, a meeting that goes sideways, a family gathering where you brace for tension. I’ve just come back from a life-shifting trip that left me feeling deeply grateful, and it also got me thinking about why we struggle so much with the conversations we know we need to have. The truth is that most conflict isn’t only about the topic, it’
Transparent Communication Builds Credibility Before You Need It
Trust is harder than ever to win, and easier than ever to lose. We sit down with Bradley Harris, a boutique strategic advisor with years in boardrooms and high-stakes environments, to break down what trust actually looks like in real communication, not theory. When media channels are fragmented and people are tired of excuses, we argue for a simple standard: tell the truth, be transparent, and tak
You Cannot Control Others But You Can Control Your Response
The news can make your chest feel heavy in seconds. One brutal headline, one angry debate, one more “nothing I do will matter” thought and suddenly you’re stuck in helplessness. We wanted to sit with that feeling and ask a simple, uncomfortable question: do we actually have choice when the world feels out of control?We start with climate change because it’s a perfect mirror for modern overwhelm. S
What If The Problem Is The System Not The Child
“You’re nice to us.” That’s what the kids said when Sally Michaels asked why they could learn in her setting but not in school, and it’s the line that frames everything we explore here. Sally runs Blue Squid, a non-school alternative provision supporting young people aged 9 to 16 who are struggling with school attendance, especially neurodivergent teenagers who feel crushed by rigid rules, sensory
Mum, Dad, We Need To Talk
The moment you realise you need to say “Mum, Dad, we need to talk” can hit like a wave. Not because you don’t love them, but because the topics are loaded: driving safety, memory changes, money worries, and the painful question of whether they can still live independently. I’m sharing a solo, honest walk-through of how I’ve handled these conversations in my own family and what I’ve learned from wo
What Would A Good Handover Look Like
Death admin is one of those tasks that feels “optional” right up until the day it becomes urgent. We sit down with Caro from Your Final Matters to talk about the reality facing the sandwich generation: juggling work, kids, and ageing parents while trying to avoid conversations about funerals, wills, powers of attorney, and what happens if someone loses capacity.Caro shares a practical, compassiona
From Anticipatory Grief To Sudden Loss And Healing Tools
One phone call can split your life into a before and after and grief rarely stops at just one loss. I’m joined by Lisa Archer from Holistic Life Coaching, who shares her deeply personal story of receiving a brain cancer diagnosis for her dad while living thousands of miles away in the UK, then facing the jolt of sudden loss soon after. We talk candidly about the difference between anticipatory gri
Under The Mask It Is Absolute Chaos
You can spend decades thinking you are disorganised, too intense, too sensitive, or simply “not trying hard enough” and still look like you have it together. Then one ADHD assessment lands, and suddenly your whole timeline rearranges itself. I’m Nicky, and I’m joined by therapist Rachel Young for a candid, sometimes emotional conversation about being assessed for combined ADHD in midlife, and what
What If Listening Is The Real Leash
Your dog is not ignoring you, they are choosing what feels most meaningful in the moment. That one idea reshapes everything, from recall training to the way we speak to the people we love. We sit down with Sam (Sameaysam.com), a relationship-first dog professional who can walk dozens of dogs off leash, and we dig into what actually makes that possible when the forest is full of better distractions
How To Respond When Someone Says They Want To Die
Someone tells you, “I can’t do this anymore,” and suddenly every sentence you’ve ever known disappears. That freeze is normal, but it’s also the moment where a few simple words and a steady presence can change the direction of a life.We’re sharing what I’ve been teaching across the UK from my work in hostage and crisis negotiation, sparked by a question from GP practice managers after a young pers
Surviving Summer With A Teenager
Your teenager used to want to do everything with you and now they would rather sleep, scroll, or stay in their room and somehow the summer holidays make that shift feel even louder. I talk honestly about the guilt, the internal questions, and the sheer exhaustion that can come with parenting teenagers when routines vanish and the push for independence ramps up. We look at the summer from both side
Parenting Teens Without Losing Yourself
Teenagers can go from cuddles to closed doors so fast it feels personal, and that’s where many parent-teen conversations start to break down. We dig into what’s really happening during adolescent brain development, why emotions run hotter than logic, and why fitting in can suddenly matter more than our opinion. Along the way, I share the book that helped me make sense of it all, “Blame My Brain,”
The World Cup, The In-Laws, And The Big Pause Button
There are parts of this podcast where the sound dips a little, this is due to a poor signal whilst recording.Holidays put relationships under a microscope. The same people you adore can become the people you clash with fastest, especially when you’re together 24-7, routines disappear, and everyone brings different needs into the same space. From a real family break with partners, mums, in-laws, pe
What Changes When You Stop Hiding
In this episode of Let's Talk About, I sit down with Tom Emery, founder of HEX Talent and Development, to explore authenticity, trust, emotional self-awareness, and the conversations many of us avoid.Tom shares his personal journey of growing up queer, hiding parts of himself from the world, and the impact that authenticity has on our confidence, relationships, and leadership. Together, we di
How To Turn Teen Conflict Into Cooperation
Your teenager didn’t wake up one morning and decide to become impossible. The shift can feel sudden, but there are real reasons behind the door-slamming, the sarcasm, the “that’s not fair”, and the long stretches of silence from their room. We bring a hostage and crisis negotiator’s lens to one of the most personal challenges there is: negotiating with teenagers while keeping your relationship int
From Trauma To Tools For Healing
Silence can feel polite, but it can also be lethal. We sit down with Heather Rose and talk about the subjects many families tiptoe around: bullying, suicide, miscarriage, and the messy reality of living with trauma while still needing to show up for the people you love.Heather shares her personal story with a rare mix of honesty and practicality, from being bullied as a teen to surviving a suicide
Living Alongside Grief
Grief is not one feeling, it is a total rewrite of your life, your body, and your relationships. We’re joined by Clare, someone who has lived through multiple devastating losses, including the sudden death of her mum from rare gallbladder cancer and the death of her seven-year-old daughter Annaliese after sepsis was not picked up in time. Clare speaks with honesty about shock, anger, brain fog tha
How To Stay Calm In Difficult Conversations
The fastest way to ruin a difficult conversation is to believe you can control the other person. We talk through what actually happens in the mind and body when stress hits, and why grief, loss, change, and fear can flip us from logical thinking into a reactive emotional state in seconds.Drawing on experience as a hostage and crisis negotiator, we share three practical lessons that show up everywh
An Undercover Cop’s Breaking Point And The Road Back
One morning can split your life in two. Todd joined me to tell the story he carried for years: finding his girlfriend Karen after she died by suicide on New Year’s Day, and the shock that followed him into everything that came next. What he shares is confronting at times, but it’s also deeply human and, for many listeners, reassuring in the most unexpected way: the feelings you’re struggling to na
When Grief Gets Quiet
The most painful part of grief can be what happens after the condolences stop. When everyone returns to their routines, the person who lost someone is left with the quiet, the calendar, and the dates that suddenly feel impossible. I’m joined by Kelly Edmondson, a trauma ICU nurse from Ohio who spent decades caring for people in crisis, until she became the one who needed care. After her son Darius
A Crisis Negotiator’s Guide To Talking About Grief
Grief can make you feel like the world should stop, yet everything keeps moving and you’re left trying to keep up. I’m on my own for this one, speaking as a former hostage and crisis negotiator who’s heard hundreds of stories from people in crisis and as a human being who has also had to carry loss. I share three hard lessons that shaped my work and my life: we will all face crisis at some stage,
Why Boys Don’t Ask For Help And How Schools Can Change That
Every suicide callout Claire attended as a police officer was male and that pattern haunted her long after the blue lights switched off. Claire Dunn joined Essex Police at 20, spent 18 years responding to crisis, and was medically retired with PTSD in 2016. She retrained, stepped into the NHS, and quickly hit a new shock: in school-based mental health services, boys were barely being referred, eve
What If Strength Meant Asking For Help
Suicide is still taking too many men, and the scariest part is how often it happens in silence. I sit down with Aldo Kane, former Royal Marines commando and one of the world’s go-to safety and expedition leads for extreme TV and film, to talk about what he’s learned from decades in high-risk, high-consequence environments and from losing close friends to suicide.We dig into why men can struggle to
How Sharing Our Stories Turns Grief Into Connection With John Kammer and Nicky Perfect
This episode is part of Podcasthon 2026, a global podcast movement highlighting the work of charities around the world. For this special release on Friday 20 March, we are proud to support SHOUT, the UK’s free, confidential, 24/7 text messaging service for anyone struggling to cope.Grief can make the world feel smaller, quieter, and strangely far away from who we used to be.In this deeply honest c
Listening Saves Lives
A quiet smile can hide a collapsing world. Michele D’Souza joins us to share the story of her brother Nick and the hard truth many of us avoid: suicidal distress often looks like recovery on the surface. We walk through the uncertainty that followed his death, the relentless guilt of being the last to see him alive, and how a decade of grief reshaped Michele’s life and work.From there, we shift in
Finding The Light After Suicidal Darkness
A hard truth unlocked everything for us: the second time you ask “Are you really okay?” is when the real answer shows up. Susie shares how she moved from being sectioned as a teenager to building a life she once thought was out of reach—work promotion, supportive love, and plans for a youth‑focused suicide prevention project. Together we break down practical tools for supporting someone in crisis:
How To Talk About Suicide With Care And Courage
🎥 Watch on YouTubeA gentle hello can change the course of a life. That’s the heart of our conversation with therapist Rachel Young, who shares how simple, human connection can interrupt a suicidal spiral without perfect words or clinical expertise. We walk through what real pain often looks like from the inside, why people describe themselves as a burden, and how a sudden “lightness” can appear af
A Candid Journey Through Addiction, Recovery, And Building The Modern Men Movement
🎥 Watch on YouTubeA football terrace nickname, TV attention, and nights out might look like belonging—but Lee’s story reveals what happens when external validation drowns out a silent, aching inside. From childhood loneliness to alcohol dependence, from extreme weight loss to a mental civil war, he takes us through the moments that pushed him to the edge—and the brutal aftermath that followed whe
Listening That Saves Lives
A quiet shift in someone’s routine can be the loudest alarm. We sit down with retired detective and crisis negotiator Nicky Hurdley to unpack how frontline negotiation skills translate into everyday conversations when a friend, teen, colleague, or partner might be suicidal. Instead of scripts or clichés, we focus on the human core: notice subtle changes, echo the exact words you hear, validate fee
From Hostage Negotiation To Lifesaving Conversations
What would you say if someone you love hinted they might not want to stay? We sit down with Sue Williams—former head of the Hostage and Kidnap Units at Scotland Yard—who brings 35 years of crisis negotiation to a question many of us fear: how do you talk about suicide with care, courage, and clarity?Sue breaks down the essentials with a precision that feels human, not clinical. We explore how to p
Breaking the Silence: Everyday Lessons from Crisis Negotiation with Danny Kett
🎥 Watch on YouTubeIn this episode, Nicky speaks with Danny Kett, a former police negotiator with 30 years of experience, 18 of those in hostage and crisis negotiation. Danny shares what crisis work taught him about conversations that matter most — especially when suicide is a concern.They discuss myths that hold people back, including the fear that mentioning suicide puts the idea in someone’s he
Courage Over Silence: Starting the Suicide Conversation
🎥 Watch on YouTubeWhen Help Feels Like Pressure: One Voice, Safe Space, and Conversations That Save LivesHost Nicky talks with former police officer and negotiator Damian about what really helps when someone is in crisis. They unpack the reality of suicide in the UK, why crowds and escalating responses can increase pressure, and how one trusted voice in a safe space can change a decision. This ep
How to have courageous conversations about suicide
Watch on YouTubeIn this episode Nicky talk to Katey Martin, a police officer and head of counter-terrorism negotiation training in the UK, discussing her experiences and the importance of suicide prevention. She highlights that 95% of their call-outs in London involve crisis situations. Katey emphasises the success of negotiators in saving lives through difficult conversations. She trained as a su
EPISODE 94 - Communication in change - episode 2
In this episode Nicky explains how human emotions play a large part in how people respond to change.She goes through the Kubler Ross grief cycle and how this helps explain why we experience the emotions we do and how you can manage them.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommu
Episode 93 - Communication in change episode 1
Episode 93 - Communication in change episode 1 by The Communication CoachResources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk
Episode 92 - How to have difficult conversations at Christmas
For many of us Christmas is a time to relax and have fun but for some of us it's a time we spend with people we don't really know or necessarily even get on with.It's also often a period filled with difficult conversations, emotion and breakup of many relationships.In this episode Nicky speaks to Janthea Brigden. Janthea owns a company called Nipperbout creating child friendly envir
Episode 91 - How to say what you really feel to your family
In this episode Nicky looks at four areas to help you have those conversations you have been putting off.Emotions - why conversations with our families can often be driven by emotions and the impact of this.Consequences - what they are and why you should think about them before you have the conversation.Beliefs - both yours and the person who you are going to talk to and how they intertwine.How to
Episode 90 - How to ask for a payrise or promotion
In this track Nicky looks at two common questions she is asked. She shares the 4 P's;Purpose - what outcome do you want from this conversation and why is it so important to you.Practice - what you are going to say and how you are going today it.Permission - give yourself permission to ask.Perspective - look at the world from the other person's point of view. How will they view your reque
Episode 89 - Values and beliefs
Episode 89 - Values and beliefs by The Communication CoachResources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk
Episode 88- How to have difficult conversations
Episode 88- How to have difficult conversations by The Communication CoachResources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk
Episode 87 - Conversations from the coffee shop Jo Berry
In this episode Nicky chats to Jo Berry. Jo's father, Sir Anthony Berry, was killed by an IRA bomb in 1984.In 2000 Jo met the man who had planted the bomb, Patrick Magee. This is her amazing story which touches on so many aspects of communication and being human. It's hard to describe this story so the best thing to do is listen as Jo tells it in her own words.Resources & support (UK
Episode 86- Why Communication Is So Important
In this track Nicky explains why she believes communication is such an important skill and yet one of the core functions of every day that gets forgotten about. When we speak to each other it's generally from an unconscious place and we don't think about the words we are saying or how we are approaching the conversation. When we become more conscious in our communication we can leave peo
Episode 85 - How to have difficult conversations and feel heard
In this episode Nicky looks at 5 steps you can take when having difficult conversations and help you to be heard.The last year and this most recent lockdown has been a challenge for everyone and sometimes this affects our relationships and our ability to communicate with others.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & train
Episode 84 - How to become more confident in your conversations
In this episode Nicky gives you five tips to help you become more confident in your conversations. Perhaps you struggle to be heard in meetings or at home, or do you struggle to get your message across in meetings.Actions for you to take:1. Practice2. Listen to what other people say and then reflect back what you have heard.3. Quietening your inner dialogue4. Being present5. Make it about the othe
Episode 83 - How to negotiate with your kids
In this episode Nicky looks at how we can negotiate with our kids especially in during lockdown.She gives 3 tips; remember our conversation comes from our own point of view, being present, listening.She also shares the plane Please Listen by Leo BuscagliaResources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect
Episode 82 - How to have conversations with your family during lockdown
As we enter the second month of this current lockdown, relationships are beginning to breakdown as people struggle with home schooling and working from home. Families have forgotten to make quality and fun time for each other as this way of life becomes the new normal. In this episode Nicky gives us four tips on how to communicate with our families during lockdown.Resources & support (UK)Samar
Episode 81 - Part 5 of my mini series on Self Refelection
Part 5 of this mini course where Nicky gets you to reflect on how you communicate. Listening is at the heart of building relationships, being fully present with someone with no judgement or trying to problem solve is incredibly powerful when it comes to building relationships and gaining trust. Without trust relationships fail, without listening and spending time with someone it's hard to bu
Episode 80 - Part 4 of my mini series on Self Refelection
In this episode we look at the think, feel, do cognitive behaviour model and how this affects the way we behave and communicate with each other.Nicky shares some of her own stories in how this works for her and how reflection is the key to change.Sometimes we don't know what we don't know, understanding how we work as individuals helps us to be able to change and grow.Resources & sup
Episode 79 - Part 3 of my mini series on Self Refelection
In this episode Nicky looks at how fear drives us and causes emotional conversations rather than logical ones. She discusses how your inner critic is there to protect you and comes from the part of the primitive brain which causes fight, flight or freeze. Nicky also discusses how being control can have an affect on how we communicate with others and when control is taken from us it causes fear.Thi
Episode 78 - Part 2 of my mini series on Self Refelection
This episode is part 2 from a 5 part mini series about self reflection and how to build relationships through communication.In this episode we loo at our own values and belief and what we believe to be true and how it drives our behaviour. Nicky gives you a challenge at the end of each session to help you become more reflective and consciously aware about how you communicate with other people.Reso
Episode 77 - Part 1 of a mini series Self Refelection
This mini series is a 5 day course where Nicky helps you to become more self aware about how you behave and why. Today is all about self reflection and the challenge is to make your behaviour and communication more conscious. It is difficult to change if you are unaware of how you behave int he first place.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) E
Episode 76 - Conversations from the coffee shop - Jess
Welcome to our conversations from the coffee shop where we meet and talk to people about their lives and their stories.In this episode we meet Jess who shares her story of how she lost her partner to heart disease at an incredibly early age, how she dealt with this by in her words "running away" and how she fell into an abusive relationship and eventually escaped. Jess shares with us the
Episode 75 - How to help others by listening
In this episode we look at one of the ways we listen to other people, the "problem solving" way. This means we focus on how we can solve the other persons problem rather than how they might be feeling, or what might be going on for them. We also discuss the poem Please Listen by Leo Buscaglia. Leo's poem shows the effect telling someone what to do can have on them.Resources & su
Episode 74 - Conversations from the coffee shop - Susie
In this track Nicky speaks to Susie. Susie is 16 and has struggled with her mental health. Susie tried to take her own life and was sectioned under the mental health act when she was 13 years old. Here she tells her story of her experience and how she is now paying it forward working with mental health organisations to help other people who might find themselves in a similar situation. A must list
Episode 73 - Validation, what it is, how it works and how to use it
In this episode Nicky explains how validating how someone is feeling helps to build relationships and creates trust. This can be in a new relationship or with a family member. Sometimes we are quick to give advice or solve the problem for the other person rather than listening to what they are saying and how are they are feeling. Recognising how a person might feel helps them to feel listened to a
Episode 72 - A car crash, a negotiator and what the negotiator learnt.
In this episode Nicky shares a recent car accident and how her emotional or limbic brain took over and how she managed to interrupt her thought patterns to gain control. She also shows how this can happen when we have arguments or react to something maybe one of our kids or partners have done and how this causes a breakdown in the relationship.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free,
Episode 71 - What's really happening when you bitch and moan about people behind their back
In this track Nicky shares why we talk about people behind their back, what drives us to this and what we can do to think about changing our behaviour.We've all done it been unkind about someone or moaned about them behind their back, we sometimes seem to thrive on belittling others but why?Sometimes the smallest change makes the biggest difference.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116
Episode 69 - How to set a good first impression
In this track /nicky discusses how to make a great first impression and gives you four tips. She shares her stories from her negotiation world and being a step parent and makes this relatable to building any sort of relationship from a job interview, first date or becoming a step parent.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools &a
Episode 68 - How being in a crisis changes how we listen
In this episode Nicky shares a story where she has been working under stress and how this has impacted the way she listened to her team and also communicated with them.In this episode you will learn:How to become more self aware so you recognise what your behaviour is.What to do if you find yourself caught up in the moment.What to do next.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7
Episode 67 - Tips on dealing with lockdown challenges
In this episode Nicky shares one of her negotiations with a young girl in a tree with a noose round her neck. She talks about the lessons she learnt, what worked and how she uses this experience in communicating with her teenage daughter.Nicky also share her experiences in lockdown and gives you some tips on how to communicate with family during this challenging time.Resources & support (UK)Sa
Episode 66 - Conversations from the coffee shop - Clare
For over a decade Nicky had the privilege of being an international hostage and crisis negotiator. During this time she learnt everyone has a story and all of us experience some sort of crisis during our own lives. Each one of our stories has a life lesson someone else can learn from. Today's story is about loss, dealing with grief and how being present and in a moment with another person can
Episode 65 - How to survive lockdown at home
In this episode Nicky share her knowledge of how hostage have survived their time in captivity and what we can learn and use as we experience these challenging times. She also shares stories from her own life and how you can use these to create better relationships as we spend far more time with each other and change our daily routines.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Sh
Episode 64- Words matter, three ways you can improve your conversation
In this track Nicky explains why she believes words are important and then gives three ways of improving and challenging yourself in your own conversation.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk
Episode 63 - How to bring your presence to the conversation
In this episode Nicky discusses what she believes presence is, the difference it makes when you bring you own presence to ta conversation and she also shares a chapter from her new book, talking about what happened and the lessons she learnt.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.the
Episode 62 - How to deal with Christmas challenges
Not everyone enjoys Christmas and sometimes we have to face challenges which seem exaggerated because of the time of year. In this episode Nicky shares some practical tips on dealing with our own emotions and also why there is conflict between people when deciding how to spend Christmas Day.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tool
Episode 61 - A chat with a team member and the lessons I learnt
In this track Nicky describes a conversation she had with a team member, how it didn't go too well and what she learned. she also shares the stages of change and how to talk to people on a one to one basis.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk
Episode 60 - The Peaky Blinders and what we can learn about negotiation
In this episode Nicky looks at one of the episodes from The Peaky Blinders series here in the UK and how one of the main characters is able to influence his sister into getting what he wants.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk
Episode 59 - How putting the organisation or business first devalues your team
In this episode Nicky explores how telling a team member they must do something because the organisation or business demands it can leave the person feeling devalued. When this happens they become less motivated and engaged and you lose their interest and good will. Spending time in the moment listening to them and then working out a solution which is still best for the business or organisation is
Episode 58 - How to learn from emotional conversations
Every day we can learn from our conversations with others. In this episode Nicky describes a simple encounter with a customer, how the conversation didn't go quite according to plan and what she learnt.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk
Episode 57 - How to negotiate with your kids part 2
In this episode Nicky discusses why managing expectations with your children helps you to get them to do a task you would like them to do but without the emotional conversation which often goes with it.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk
Episode 56 - How to speak to someone in crisis
In this episode Nicky gives you 5 ways of how to have a conversation with someone in crisis. This episode is specifically for those people in an emotional relationship with someone else and how this can impact on our ability to be rational and how our belief systems can take over the conversation. she also shares her experience of negotiations and what she learnt from each one.Resources & supp
Episode 55 - Your lens, my lens
We generally view the world through our own lens and what we believe to be true, when this happens we sometimes don't appreciate the other person is also viewing the world through their lens. This can cause conflict or misunderstandings. Once you are aware of how you view different situations then you can change how you communicate.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)S
Episode 54 - How to have a difficult conversation
It can sometimes be difficult to have a conversation where you are going to tell someone how you feel. We often play the scenario round in our head and build it up. In this episode Nicky shows you how to approach having a a difficult conversation and ways of structuring taking ownership and control.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore m
Episode 53- Why clarity in conversation is so important
In this weeks episode Nicky discusses how misunderstandings in conversations can lead to ill feeling, relationship breakdown and possibly even caused the death of Thomas Beckett!! She also shows you ways of checking to make sure you understand the message someone gives to you and also how to check someone has received the message you meant to send.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (f
Episode 52- The passing of a friend and 3 lessons I have learnt
In this episode Nicky shares an experience of losing a friend this week and three lessons she has learnt. Each lesson is based on communicating with others, building relationships and dealing with loss and challenges.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk
Episode 51- Why trust matters
In this episode Nicky discusses why trust is so important and how to gain trust.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk
Episode 50- The power of honest conversations
In this episode Nicky describes how honest conversations are the root of strong relationships. she describes the three character traits of conflict, submissive, assertive and aggressive and how these impact on relationships. She also shows you how to have honest conversations, taking responsibility for your own feelings and phrasing these into a conversation.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans:
Episode 49- 3 Lessons I have learnt from the younger generation
In this episode Nicky discusses what she has learnt from three conversations with younger people this week and how making assumptions reflects in how we communicate with others.She also explains what mirroring really is and how you can use this in every day communication to get the most from another person.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) E
Episode 48- How to stop your emotional brain taking over
Episode 48- How to stop your emotional brain taking over by The Communication CoachResources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk
Recommended
Psychology, Actually
A Good Read
Easy English: Learn English with everyday conversations
Esme's Country Life
Miles From Ordinary Podcast
Off The Telly
Murder of a Famous Bastard
My IELTS Classroom Podcast
People Fixing the World
Frank Off The Radio: The Frank Skinner Podcast
Newscast
Learning English from the News
