An Evolving Man Podcast explores leadership, emotional intelligence, trauma, healing and peak performance. Hosted by Piers Cross, the show features conversations with leading psychologists, psychiatrists, executive coaches, authors, researchers and high-performance leaders, alongside solo episodes on leadership, resilience, relationships and personal transformation. Drawing on the latest research in psychology, neuroscience, attachment, trauma and human performance, the podcast helps leaders develop greater self-awareness, emotional intelligence and the capacity to lead with clarity, compassion and courage. Whether you are a CEO, founder, entrepreneur or aspiring leader, each episode offers practical insights to help you thrive professionally while creating a more meaningful and connected life.
Episodes
Thank You, Boarding School Concern | Reflections After the 2026 Conference
A short reflection and thank you following the Boarding School Concern Conference 2026 in London.Piers Cross shares his appreciation for the organisers, speakers, facilitators and everyone who took the time to come over and say hello during the day.Having first attended the conference around 2018/19, Piers reflects on how different it now feels to return and recognise familiar faces within the Boa
What Lies Beneath Addiction? The Mother Rift, Boarding School & Healing | Vanessa Wallace AEM #177
Why do we become addicted — and what might have happened long before the substance ever entered the picture?In Episode 177 of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross speaks with psychotherapist, author and recovering addict Vanessa Wallace, whose own recovery began in 2001.Vanessa's latest book, The Mother Solution, grew from a deeper question about her addiction. Rather than simply asking why s
Boarding on Insanity Documentary Coming to YouTube | Full Film Release 28 November
Boarding on Insanity is coming to YouTube.On Saturday 28 November 2026, we will release the full documentary publicly on YouTube.After several years of filming, producing, screening and sharing the film, Simon Hinkley, Ben Cole and I felt the time had come to make it freely and easily shareable.Boarding on Insanity explores:The psychological impact of boarding schoolBoarding school syndrome and ch
Men, Workaholism & Emotional Armour: Learning to Slow Down | AEM #176 Sam Adams
What if the inability to stop working and the tendency to withdraw from life come from the same underlying wound?In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross speaks with Sam Adams, founder of Coaching for Men, who has spent 25 years working with men's groups, coaching, counselling and nature-based facilitation. Sam explores why so many men live at one of two extremes: continually
Boarding School Syndrome & Loneliness: Why Success Can Still Feel Empty | Piers Cross
Why can somebody appear highly successful and connected on the outside while feeling profoundly lonely inside?In this episode, Piers Cross explores loneliness and boarding school syndrome, drawing together his own experience, client work and ideas from Nick Duffell and Pete Walker.For a child sent away to boarding school, acknowledging loneliness may have felt unbearable. Homesickness had to be s
Boarding School Syndrome Through Poetry: Separation, Trauma & Healing | SENT AWAY | AEM #175 Paul Fray | Nicola Freeman | Guy Mutch
What can poetry reveal about the psychological impact of being sent away to boarding school?In Episode 175 of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross is joined by Paul Fray, Nicola Freeman and Guy to explore SENT AWAY: The BSConcern Anthology of Boarding School Poems.Through powerful poems and personal reflections, they explore:The first separation from home and parentsHomesickness, abandonment and e
Boarding School Concern Conference 2026 | Boarding School Syndrome, Healing & Support
What is it like to attend a conference where people genuinely understand the experience of being sent away to boarding school?In this short episode, Piers Cross shares details of the Boarding School Concern Conference 2026, taking place in London on Saturday 7 November.Piers has attended the conference several times and reflects on why it can be particularly valuable for former boarders who are be
From Trauma & Dissociation to Embodied Trust | Sara Carter | AEM #174
What happens when trauma becomes so deeply embedded that we lose connection with our own bodies?In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross speaks with embodiment coach, somatic movement educator and holistic trauma therapist Sara Carter about complex PTSD, dissociation and the long journey back towards safety and embodied trust.Sara describes a period of chronic pain, severe fatigue,
Joe Dispenza Retreat Integration: What to Do When the High Wears Off | Piers Cross
What happens after the retreat ends?In this short episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross explores the often-overlooked process of post-retreat integration following his recent Dr Joe Dispenza retreats in Basel and Copenhagen.After an intense peak experience, it can be surprising to return home and begin feeling flat, uninspired or triggered by familiar relationships, responsibilities and
Traumality: What Happened to You? Rethinking Mental Health | Ton Mazzone | AEM #173
What changes when we stop asking “What’s wrong with you?” and begin asking “What happened to you?”In Episode 173 of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross speaks with Ton Mazzone, filmmaker behind Traumality — an independently produced documentary exploring childhood adversity, attachment, trauma, the nervous system and mental health.Ton spent years struggling with social anxiety and depression. Aft
Dr Joe Dispenza Week-Long Retreat Review: Highlights, Challenges & Insights | Piers Cross
What happens when you step out of everyday life and spend a week immersed in meditation, teaching and personal development?In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross reflects on attending Dr Joe Dispenza’s week-long retreat in Copenhagen, following a Progressive Retreat in Basel.Piers had booked the retreats during a difficult period following the death of his wife Michelle. Although
Real Resilience: Why Pushing Through Isn’t Enough | Russell Harvey | AEM #172
What if resilience isn’t about becoming tougher?In Episode 172 of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross speaks with Russell Harvey, The Resilience Coach, about what genuine resilience looks like for leaders, teams and organisations.Russell defines resilience as “springing forward with learning” rather than endlessly pushing through adversity. He describes the difference between surviving, coping an
How to Reconnect With Joy on the Healing Journey | Piers Cross
Can healing and self-development become so serious that we forget to actually enjoy our lives? After returning from retreats in Copenhagen and Basel, Piers Cross reflects on something he realised while away: he had forgotten some of the joy. In this short episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers explores how busyness, striving and constant self-improvement can pull us away from gratitude, connec
Boarding School Syndrome: The First Stage of Healing | Piers Cross
What is the first step in healing boarding school syndrome?In this short episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross explores the importance of understanding and education at the beginning of a healing journey.Drawing on Pete Walker’s work on complex PTSD, Piers reflects on how learning about trauma and boarding school syndrome can give language and context to experiences that may previously h
Why Former Boarders Become Perfectionists — And Burn Out | Piers Cross
Why do so many former boarders struggle with perfectionism, overworking and the feeling that they are never quite good enough?In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross explores the link between boarding school syndrome, perfectionism, the inner critic and burnout.At boarding school, mistakes can carry a social cost. Vulnerability may be hidden, everyone else can appear to have it “so
Prince George Starts at Eton: Boarding School, Separation & Emotional Survival | Piers Cross
What can the first day at boarding school feel like for a child?Following Prince George’s arrival at Eton College, Piers Cross reflects on his own first days at boarding school and the psychology of leaving home for a large residential institution.Drawing on the work of Nick Duffell and Joy Schaverien, Piers explores the “threshold moment” when a child begins to understand emotionally—not merely i
From Broadway’s Hamilton to a Heart Attack: Burnout & Transformation | Julian Reeve | AEM #171
What happens when reaching the top still isn’t enough?In Episode 171 of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross speaks with Julian Reeve, international keynote speaker, author and creator of the Perfect Equilibrium methodology.Julian worked across the West End and Broadway before joining the team behind Hamilton. In 2017, while Music Director of the show’s first US national tour, he suffered a stress
Boarding School Syndrome & the Inner Critic: Why We’re So Hard on Ourselves
Why are so many former boarders relentlessly hard on themselves?In this short episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross explores the brutal inner critic that can develop through boarding school and childhood trauma.Piers reflects on how being humiliated for showing emotion led him to begin attacking himself internally before other people could do it. What originally helped create protection
Why Your Child’s Behaviour Isn’t the Problem | Geoff Owen | AEM #170
What if difficult behaviour is not something to control—but something to understand?In Episode 170 of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross speaks with Geoff Owen, founder of Biologically Aligned Parenting and author of The Parenting Assumption.Geoff argues that children are born with innate needs for safety, certainty, connection and regulation. When those needs are not sufficiently met, behaviour
End of Summer Anxiety & Boarding School Syndrome | Piers Cross
Why can the end of summer bring unexpected anxiety, sadness or unease for former boarders?In this short episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross explores how late August and early September can unconsciously reconnect ex-boarders with the repeated childhood experience of leaving home and returning to boarding school.After weeks at home, children often had to prepare themselves to separate f
Why We Stay Stuck in Addiction | Alcohol, Trauma & Grief with Colleen Clifford | AEM #169
What is the story beneath addictive behaviour?In Episode 169 of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross speaks with commercial fisherwoman, health coach, speaker and alcohol-free living advocate Colleen Clifford.Colleen spent more than three decades working in Alaska’s commercial fishing industry. Months at sea without alcohol made it easier for her to believe that her binge drinking was under contro
I Didn’t Like Boarding School — So Why Did I Send My Children? | Piers Cross
Why would someone who had an unhappy or frightening experience at boarding school go on to send their own children there?In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross explores the psychology of intergenerational repetition and boarding school.Drawing on his own experience and material from Trauma, Abandonment & Privilege, James Blunt, Bear Grylls and Tina Brown, Piers examines the co
How to Rebuild Focus in a Distracted World | George Molakal & Brian Throckmorton | AEM #168
Can attention be trained like a muscle—and can technology help us recover the focus that technology itself is eroding?In Episode 168 of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross speaks with George Molakal, CEO and co-founder of MindSpring Innovation, and Brian Throckmorton, co-founder and board member.Their work began with personal experience. Both had watched their children struggle with focus, school
Why Change Feels So Uncomfortable After Boarding School | Piers Cross
Why can transitions feel disproportionately difficult for former boarders?In this short episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross reflects on his own nervousness before leaving for a workshop and retreat—and explores how apparently ordinary transitions can activate much older emotional patterns.Drawing on the work of Nick Duffell and Thurstine Basset in Trauma, Abandonment & Privilege, P
Attachment Wounds, Codependency and Rupture Repair | Nima Rahmany AEM #167
In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I speak with Nima Rahmany, nervous system and attachment specialist, transformational coach and founder of the Trigger Proof methodology.Nima works with high-achieving individuals, couples, parents and leaders to understand the deeper patterns behind reactivity, people-pleasing, trauma bonds, emotional shutdown and codependency.This is a powerful convers
Why High Achieving Leaders Can’t Switch Off | Burnout, Rest and Leadership
Why do so many successful leaders struggle to switch off?In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I explore why high-achieving leaders often find it difficult to rest, sleep, stop working, put the phone down or be fully present with family.This is not simply a time management issue.For many leaders, the nervous system has learned to stay permanently “on”.Drawing on Jim Collins, Brad Stulberg, S
Why Conflict Can Deepen Love | Dr. Judith Wright on Emotional Intelligence and Relationships | AEM #166
In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I speak with Dr. Judith Wright, relationship expert, author and co-founder of the Wright Foundation for the Realization of Human Potential.Judith has spent more than 40 years helping individuals and couples transform conflict into connection, deepen emotional intelligence and create more meaningful lives.We explore why conflict is not necessarily a sign
I’m Not a Leader? Why We Are All Leaders | Compassionate Leadership
What if you are already a leader, even if you do not have the title?In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I explore the belief many people hold: “I’m not a leader.”This often comes up in conversations about the Compassionate Leader Pathway. People say they are not in a senior position, not a CEO, not a manager, or not the kind of person they imagine a leader to be.But leadership is not only
Birthdays and Boarding School
What were birthdays like in boarding school?Were they celebrated or ignored?Or did you get hazed or bullied on your birthday.Take care,Piers---Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evol
Why Do the Same People Keep Triggering Me? Leadership, Shadow Work and Boundaries
Why do the same people keep triggering us?Why do certain relationships, colleagues, family members or situations seem to provoke the same reaction again and again?In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I explore emotional triggers from the perspective of leadership, Jungian psychology, boarding school trauma, nervous system regulation and personal sovereignty.This is an important subject for
Kindness in Schools: Creating Emotional Safety for Children | Masha Kastner & David Moss | AEM #165
In this deeply moving episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I speak with Masha Castner and David Moss, founders and directors of Kind Waves.Kind Waves is a UK charity created to help schools build deeper cultures of kindness, emotional safety and positive relationships. The charity was born from the heartbreaking death of Masha and David’s 13-year-old daughter, Helena, known as Heli, who took her ow
5 Reasons We Need to Stop Sending Future Leaders to Boarding School
Prince George is set to attend Eton College, continuing a long tradition of future leaders being educated in elite boarding schools.But is this really the best way to prepare someone for leadership in the 21st century?In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I explore five reasons why we need to stop sending our future leaders to boarding school.Drawing on modern leadership literature, boarding
Porn Addiction, Shame & Mindfulness | Jeremy Lipkowitz on Breaking Free from Destructive Habits | AEM #164
In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I speak with Jeremy Lipkowitz, executive coach, meditation teacher, leadership facilitator and founder of Unhooked Academy.Jeremy works with high-achieving men who want to break free from destructive habits, porn addiction, compulsive sexual behaviour, shame and emotional avoidance. After overcoming addiction and depression in his early twenties through
Keir Starmer Resigns: What Britain’s Leadership Crisis Reveals About Emotional Intelligence
For Thursday's leadership workshop: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/1991361811785?aff=oddtdtcreatorKeir Starmer’s resignation marks another major moment in British political leadership.If the UK is now heading towards its seventh Prime Minister in just over a decade, the deeper question is not simply who comes next.The deeper question is:What kind of leadership culture are we creating?In this
Boarding School Syndrome, Power & Politics | Dominic Waterson on Boris Johnson, Tony Blair & Elite Leadership |AEM #163
Why do so many politicians, business leaders and influential public figures come from boarding schools?In this fascinating conversation, I sit down with researcher, author and podcaster Dominic Waterson to explore the hidden influence of childhood experiences, elite education and institutional culture on leadership and power.Drawing on years of research for his book Traitors: The Pandemic Politici
The Conversations You're Not Having | Piers Cross
For the workshop: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/the-conversations-youre-not-having-tickets-1991361811785?aff=oddtdtcreator&keep_tld=true Many leaders, entrepreneurs and former boarders avoid the conversations that matter most.Not because they don't know what needs to be said.But because somewhere deep in the nervous system, speaking up still feels dangerous.In this episode of An Evolvin
Lessons from Training 90,000 People | Why High Achievers Still Feel Empty | AEM #162 Will Steel
What if the thing holding you back isn't your circumstances, your team, your strategy, or even your mindset?What if it's the story you've been unconsciously living for decades?In this powerful conversation, leadership coach and author Will Steel shares his journey from Royal Air Force pilot to transformational coach and leadership expert.Together we explore authenticity, emotional i
Boarding School Syndrome: The Grief We Were Never Allowed to Feel | Piers Cross
When my wife Michelle died in 2025, I expected grief.What I did not expect was that her death would reconnect me with another loss that had remained hidden for decades.The loss of my mother.The loss of my family.The loss of home.The loss of safety.The loss that began when I was sent away to boarding school.In this deeply personal episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I explore the striking similarit
Police Chief: From Ego to Emotional Intelligence: Dr. Ron Camacho on Leadership & Trauma | AEM #161
What happens when a leader confronts their own trauma?In this fascinating conversation, Piers Cross sits down with Dr. Ron Kamacho, police chief, leadership consultant and author, to explore how emotional intelligence transformed his life and leadership.Ron shares his journey from highly driven, ego-based leadership to a more compassionate, accountable and emotionally intelligent approach.Together
Prep School vs Public School: Which Was Harder?
One of the questions I hear most often from former boarders is:"Why did I hate prep school but love public school?"Or sometimes:"Why was public school much harder than prep school?"In this solo episode, I explore the different experiences people report and why those differences may exist.Drawing on stories from Roald Dahl, David Cameron, Ranulph Fiennes, Bear Grylls and John Pe
Why Ex-Boarders Struggle With Boundaries | Boarding School Trauma, People Pleasing & Leadership
Why do so many boarding school survivors struggle with boundaries?In this episode, Piers Cross explores how boarding school conditioning can shape people pleasing, emotional suppression and difficulty saying no later in life.Drawing on trauma theory, attachment work and years of coaching leaders and ex-boarders, Piers explores why boundaries can feel dangerous for many trauma survivors — and why n
Why Do We Self Sabotage As Ex-Boarders?
To register for the webinar: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/why-smart-leaders-still-self-sabotage-identify-and-break-hidden-patterns-tickets-1988408152310Why do we sabotage the very things we say we want?In this episode, Piers Cross explores self-sabotage through the lens of boarding school survival patterns, trauma, leadership and nervous system regulation.Drawing on Gay Hendricks’ concept of th
Polyvagal Theory, Vagus Nerve & Boarding School Trauma
Here is the link to this Friday's podcast with Sara Warner about the vagus nerve and wearables: https://youtu.be/HpxcTW0oKI8 In this episode, I explore polyvagal theory, the vagus nerve, childhood trauma and boarding school syndrome.Following my recent conversation with Sarah Warner about vagus nerve stimulation, wearables and nervous system regulation, I wanted to look more closely at what
Why Criticism Feels So Painful for Ex-Boarders
In this episode, I explore why criticism can feel so painful for those of us who went to boarding school.For many ex-boarders, criticism does not simply feel like feedback. It can feel like danger. It can activate old patterns of shame, fear, compliance, dissociation or defensiveness.I reflect on boarding school conditioning, the fear of getting things wrong, Nick Duffell’s work on wounded leaders
Music Therapy, Boarding School Trauma & Healing Through Connection | Helen Odell-Miller | AEM #159
In Episode 159 of An Evolving Man Podcast, I’m joined by Professor Helen Odell-Miller OBE, one of the UK’s leading pioneers in music therapy.Helen has spent decades working with trauma, attachment, mental health and emotional healing through music. She also worked closely with the late Joy Schaverien, whose work on boarding school syndrome transformed the conversation around early separation and i
Does Boarding School Create Resilience… or Dissociation?
Many boarding schools claim they build resilience.But what if what they often create is something else entirely?In this episode, I explore the difference between true resilience and dissociation, and why so many ex-boarders struggle with relationships, emotional regulation, connection and rest later in life.Drawing on the work of Barbara Fredrickson, Emma Seppälä, Joy Schaverien, Nick Duffell and
Crowds & Power at Boarding School | Why We Joined In (And How to Forgive Ourselves) | Piers Cross
In this episode, I explore the powerful influence of crowds and group behaviour, particularly within boarding school environments.Why do people join in when someone is being shamed or targeted? Why does it happen so quickly — and often without conscious thought?Drawing on Elias Canetti’s Crowds and Power and modern neuroscience around mirror neurons, this episode looks at how emotional contagion s
Third Culture Kid, Boarding School Survivor, Humanitarian | Peter Sykes’ Powerful Story | AEM #158
In Episode 158 of An Evolving Man Podcast, I’m joined by Peter Sykes — humanitarian, strategist, writer and author of Somewhere Never Home.Peter has led major humanitarian responses across the world, but in this conversation we explore the deeply personal side of his story.We talk about growing up as a third culture kid, being sent to boarding school at age 10, identity loss, addiction, achievemen
The Loss of Identity at Boarding School | Shame, Conformity & Healing
In this short solo episode, I reflect on one of the deepest impacts of boarding school:The loss of identity.What happens when children learn that their name, hobbies, feelings and individuality are not safe?Drawing on my recent conversation with Peter Sykes, I explore how institutional environments shape children into survival personalities — the complier, the rebel or the crushed child.We also lo
UK Child Protection: Grooming | Safeguarding Failures | What Schools Aren’t Telling Parents | AEM #157
In episode 157 of An Evolving Man, I speak with Kimberly Isherwood and Joan Ginsberg from Public Child Protection Wales.Together we explore one of the most urgent and difficult issues in modern society: how we genuinely protect children from harm.Kimberly and Joan share why Public Child Protection Wales was founded, what they see happening on the ground in education and safeguarding, and why they
Boarding on Insanity Screening in Glastonbury (18th April) | Trauma, Leadership & Group Healing
To buy tickets for the Glastonbury screening on 18th April 6.30-9pm or to share it: https://www.tickettailor.com/events/goodwillinactiontopreventsuicidecio/2140155 In this short video, I’m sharing some reflections and inviting you to a special screening of our documentary Boarding on Insanity on April 18th in Glastonbury.This feels like a full-circle moment, as we return to the very retreat centr
Childhood Trauma, Identity & Emotional Truth | AEM #156 Christopher J Wesley
In Episode 156 of An Evolving Man, I speak with Christopher J. Wesley — artist, speaker, and emotional leadership thinker — about trauma, identity, and emotional truth in a world shaped by pressure, performance, and algorithms.Christopher shares his powerful journey from early childhood abuse to rebuilding his identity through grief, creativity, and self-awareness.We explore how trauma shapes the
Boarding School Syndrome & The Outer Critic | Pete Walker's Complex PTSD | Inner | Piers Cross
In this episode of An Evolving Man, I explore the concept of the outer critic — a key pattern in trauma, CPTSD, and boarding school syndrome.Drawing on the work of Pete Walker, we look at how unresolved emotional pain can turn outward, shaping how we judge, mistrust, and distance ourselves from others.While the inner critic attacks the self, the outer critic targets others — often silently and unc
Flow State, Burnout, Purpose and the Future of Leadership | AEM #155 Deri Llewellyn-Davies
In this episode of An Evolving Man, I’m joined by Deri Llewellyn-Davies — boardroom strategist, creator of the Ultra States framework, and someone deeply immersed in the worlds of performance, pressure, recovery, and leadership.Deri has worked with hundreds of boards and has also pushed himself through extreme endurance events, giving him a rare perspective on what prolonged pressure does to the h
Digestion & Stomach Problems | A Common Symptom of Ex-Boarders | Piers Cross
Over the years I have noticed a common ailment among ex-boarders. And that is stomach issues. Why is that? And what can we do now? #digestion #trauma #boardingschoolsyndrome ---Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, re
Andrew, Fergie, Epstein & Boarding School Trauma: A Psychological Perspective
Prince Andrew, Epstein, and boarding school trauma — exploring the psychology behind early experiences and adult behaviour.In this episode, I explore the psychological patterns that may sit beneath well-known public narratives.Looking at Prince Andrew, Sarah Ferguson, and Ghislaine Maxwell, I reflect on their early childhood experiences — including boarding school and family dynamics — and how the
Beautiful Leadership: Integrity, Empathy, Ethics & Leading Under Pressure | AEM #154 Dawn Stallwood | Piers Cross
In this episode of An Evolving Man, I speak with Dawn Stallwood — corporate and commercial lawyer turned leadership counsel, chief integrity officer, entrepreneur, and author of Beautiful Leadership.Dawn brings nearly three decades of experience advising boards, founders and senior leaders, and in this conversation we explore what it really means to lead with integrity, empathy, humility and coura
Boarding School In The Press, Film & Media | Elio | Young Sherlock | Eton | St Chris' | Piers Cross
For the leaders' workshop about dealing with pressure: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/leadership-under-pressure-how-you-can-manage-pressure-better-tickets-1982772564114?utm-campaign=social&utm-content=attendeeshare&utm-medium=discovery&utm-term=listing&utm-source=cp&aff=ebdsshcopyurl ---Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mai
Pressure Reveals Conditioning: Leadership, Stress and Emotional Intelligence
How do leaders behave when pressure rises?In this episode, Piers Cross explores how stress reveals the underlying conditioning that shapes leadership behaviour.Drawing on leadership research and psychology, the conversation looks at how many leaders unconsciously revert to learned survival strategies under pressure — particularly those who grew up in highly structured or emotionally restrictive en
Beyond the Shell: Leadership, Anxiety and Emotional Ownership | AEM #153 Matt Young | Piers Cross
Piers Cross speaks with leadership coach and former professional footballer Matt Young about identity, emotional intelligence, and sustainable performance.After eight years in elite sport, Matt’s career ended abruptly. Without football, he was forced to confront anxiety, self-doubt, and a deeper fear many high achievers recognise — not being good enough beneath the role. That painful period led hi
The First Night: Boarding School Separation and the Psychology of Attachment
In this episode, Piers Cross explores the psychological impact of a child’s first night at boarding school and why it often becomes a lifelong emotional imprint.Drawing on accounts from Richard Branson, Sebastian Faulks, and Peter Sykes, we examine what happens when children are separated from their families at a young age. Many remember intense fear, others remember nothing at all — a sign of dis
Jane Barclay: Boarding School, the Body, and the Long Road Back to Love | AEM #152
In this episode, Piers Cross is joined by Jane Barclay, a humanistic psychology practitioner, UKCP-accredited, and a member of the BACP.Jane shares her journey into counselling and trauma work — beginning with a major life move, a profound sense of disorientation, and what she later recognised as a traumatic reaction to separation. Her story moves into the heart of boarding school experience: ear
The Train That Never Stops: Boarding School Conditioning, Overwork and Burnout
Many leaders and high performers live as if they are unable to stop.In this episode, Piers Cross explores the long-term psychological effects of boarding school timetabling and how it conditions the nervous system to equate busyness with safety.Children raised in highly structured environments learn to stay constantly active. Stillness becomes uncomfortable — even threatening. As adults this often
Boarding School Shame: How It Shapes Identity, Safety, and Self-Trust | AEM #151 Jessica Boston
What does boarding school shame do to a child’s nervous system — especially when it’s wrapped in privilege, silence, and “you should be grateful”? In this episode of An Evolving Man, I’m joined by Jessica Boston — trauma-informed transformation coach and creator of The Homecoming Method (a somatic approach integrating subconscious reprogramming, nervous-system safety, and reparenting). Together w
One Year on From My Wife's Death - 3 Learnings That Have Helped Me | Piers Cross
One year on from my wife, Michelle's death.What are some reflections? What are 3 things that have really helped me?Here is the interview with her: https://youtu.be/fKs1A_4xw7ATake care,Piers---Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. He also runs online men's groups
Dr. Amy Albright — Safety, Trauma, and the Neuroscience of Human Potential | AEM #150
In this episode of An Evolving Man, I’m joined by Dr. Amy Albright, an expert in human potential who bridges neuroscience, health, business strategy, and spirituality with rare depth and academic rigour.We go deep into a theme that affects so many leaders — especially those shaped by early separation, boarding school, adoption, or childhood trauma: safety.Amy explains why safety is not a motivatio
Safety, Boarding School, and the Nervous System: What the Body Remembers
What happens to a child’s nervous system when safety is missing — not for a moment, but for years?In this episode, Piers reflects on safety and boarding school, exploring how chronic fear, hypervigilance, and emotional suppression shape the adult nervous system long after school ends.Drawing from lived experience, trauma psychology, and insights from neuroscientist Dr. Amy Albright, this conversat
Masati: Near-Death Experiences, Trauma, Coherence & Exponential Intelligence | AEM #149
In this episode of An Evolving Man, I’m joined by Masati, CEO and founder of Exponential Intelligence Science (XI). After multiple near-death experiences, Masati devoted his life to understanding human potential beyond conventional performance psychology—exploring coherence, consciousness, and what creates real, measurable change.We begin with Masati’s personal story: a life-threatening accident i
Why Ex-Boarders Struggle With Decision-Making | Trauma, Leadership & Intuition
Why do so many ex-boarders struggle with decision-making — especially in senior leadership, relationships, and life?In this reflective solo episode, I explore how boarding school conditioning shapes our ability to think independently, trust intuition, and make decisions without fear of rejection or punishment.Drawing on the work of Nick Duffell, I unpack the three core survival patterns often seen
Jon Wedger (Ex-Met Detective) on Institutional Child Sexual Abuse, Cover-Ups, and Why Justice Matters | AEM #148
In this powerful episode of An Evolving Man, Piers Cross speaks with Jon Wedger (also widely known as John Wedger) — former Metropolitan Police detective and leading UK whistleblower on institutional child sexual abuse and safeguarding failures.Jon shares what he witnessed while working in specialist units, including child protection, and why he believes abuse is too often protected by silence, st
Speaking Up at the House of Commons: Fear, Courage & Choosing the Challenge Response | Piers Cross
In this short reflection recorded outside the House of Commons, Piers Cross shares a deeply personal moment before screening a documentary on institutional harm and child protection.He explores:The fear of speaking upHow trauma can wire us to avoid, hide, or runThe shift from threat response to challenge responseWhy embracing discomfort can improve performance, resilience, and even longevityRefere
Boarding School Syndrome in Women: Trauma, Hyper-Independence & Healing | Kara Blackmore | AEM #147
In this episode of An Evolving Man, Piers speaks with Kara Blackmore — a trauma-informed coach specialising in the long-term emotional and nervous system impacts of boarding school experiences, especially for women.Kara shares her personal story: choosing boarding school at age 10, the shock of early separation, and the reality of living in an environment with minimal adult supervision, rigid cont
Moral Injury & Boarding School | How Early Institutional Trauma Damages a Child’s Moral Compass
In this episode, Piers explores the concept of moral injury and asks whether boarding school environments can create a deep, values-based psychological wound in children.Moral injury occurs when someone is forced to act against, witness, or remain silent in the face of behaviour that violates their inner moral values. Unlike PTSD, which is fear-based, moral injury is rooted in guilt, shame, loss o
Boarding School, Stress & Performance: England Cricket, Trauma & Leadership
Here is the link to reach out to your MP for the screening in the House of Commons: https://seenheard.org.uk/boarding-on-insanity-parliamentary-screening/In this New Year reflection episode, I share an update on the upcoming House of Commons screening of Boarding on Insanity and explore a powerful insight that emerged for me over Christmas while watching the Ashes series.Why does England’s cricket
Home Alone vs UK Boarding School Culture: The Psychology of Separation | Piers Cross
This week I rewatched Home Alone — and realised it can be viewed as a surprisingly powerful study of child development, attachment, and the psychology of separation.Kevin is eight years old — an age that matters deeply in the UK context, because it has historically been an age when many children began boarding school. In this short reflection, I explore key moments in the film through a boarding-s
The Mother Wound & Boarding School | Rupture, Repair, and the Cost of Separation | Piers Cross
In this reflective episode, Piers Cross explores boarding school, the mother wound, and the lasting impact of early separation from parents — particularly as Christmas approaches.Inspired by a powerful public conversation between Amelia White and her mother, Piers reflects on how boarding school disrupts natural attachment, prevents rupture and repair, and often leaves relationships with parents —
Protect Children: Boarding School Abuse & Mandatory Reporting | House of Commons Screening
For the article in the Telegraph: https://www.telegraph.co.uk/education-and-careers/2025/12/03/working-at-a-boarding-school-is-like-being-in-a-cult/ And for the letter to write to your MP: https://seenheard.org.uk/boarding-on-insanity-parliamentary-screening/ In this short solo episode, I share an update and a heartfelt thank you.On 19th January 2026, we’ll be hosting a special screening of our d
Boarding School, Neurodiversity & Shame: Adverse School Experiences | Ian Keys & Piers Cross AEM#146
In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast (AEM #146), I speak with Ian Keys, an ex-boarder, youth worker and newly qualified counsellor, about what really happens when neurodiverse children move through a schooling system that doesn’t understand them.Ian started boarding school at 11 and left with no qualifications, convinced he was “thick”. Decades later, after working with excluded teenagers, f
Are Boarding Schools Ending? The Quiet Collapse No One Is Talking About | Piers Cross
Are boarding schools reaching the end of the road?To contact your MP to get them to attend the House of Commons screening please visit here: https://seenheard.org.uk/boarding-on-insanity-parliamentary-screening/ In today’s episode, I reflect on last week’s conference honouring Dr Joy Schaverien and share surprising insights from conversations with people working inside the current boarding school
Honouring Joy Schaverien: A Landmark Event on Boarding School Trauma | Piers Cross
In this episode, I share reflections on the upcoming event The Silent Damage of Boarding School — a special day honouring the life and work of Dr Joy Schaverien, whose research into Boarding School Syndrome has transformed the field of trauma and psychotherapy.I walk through what the event includes, who will be speaking, and why Joy’s contributions continue to be so influential across psychology,
